Nalcie
In Book #26: “What is a Family?”, Allisen is excited when she finds out Nalcie will be staying with her family for two weeks. And the first day of Nalcie’s visit is really fun. Hey, what isn’t fun about having a friend visit and sleep over?
After just a couple days of Nalcie being there, though, Allisen starts becoming annoyed with Nalcie constantly following her around and wanting to do everything with her. It isn’t long before she starts looking forward to Nalcie going home.
Sometimes—even if you’re really good friends with someone—it starts becoming old if you’re spending too much time with them. You notice irritating traits that you didn’t notice before. Or, the annoying traits that you were able to ignore before suddenly become overbearing. When I started college, I learned that my university allowed people to pick their own roommates. However, staff and students alike strongly advised, “Don’t choose to room with your best friend!” It might sound like weird advice, but they explained that often, best friends who choose to room together in college are unaware of what it will be like to actually live with each other. Their habits and idiosyncrasies start to annoy one another, living in such close quarters makes it difficult for them to have time away from each other, and what they thought would be a great thing actually ends up ruining their friendship.
Spending too much time together almost ruined Allisen’s friendship with Nalcie. Fortunately, they were able to fix it, and then Nalcie went back to her own house. If Nalcie had stayed for longer, the two girls probably eventually would have gotten into a routine that worked for both of them—with Allisen spending some of her time with Nalcie, and still having some time to herself as well. But who knows how long it would have taken, and how many more problems they would have had, before they reached that point?
If you have a friend who is too clingy, or wanting to spend all of her time with you without giving you time to do anything else, it might be a good idea to talk to her about it. Explain, “I like you, and I have fun hanging out with you. But sometimes I need some time to myself, or some time to spend with so-and-so. I still want to hang out with you, just not all the time.” It’s important in this situation to be both honest and tactful (Lies will cause them to mistrust you once they learn the truth, and lack of tact could leave them sad, angry, hurt, or feeling like you no longer want to be around them at all).
After just a couple days of Nalcie being there, though, Allisen starts becoming annoyed with Nalcie constantly following her around and wanting to do everything with her. It isn’t long before she starts looking forward to Nalcie going home.
Sometimes—even if you’re really good friends with someone—it starts becoming old if you’re spending too much time with them. You notice irritating traits that you didn’t notice before. Or, the annoying traits that you were able to ignore before suddenly become overbearing. When I started college, I learned that my university allowed people to pick their own roommates. However, staff and students alike strongly advised, “Don’t choose to room with your best friend!” It might sound like weird advice, but they explained that often, best friends who choose to room together in college are unaware of what it will be like to actually live with each other. Their habits and idiosyncrasies start to annoy one another, living in such close quarters makes it difficult for them to have time away from each other, and what they thought would be a great thing actually ends up ruining their friendship.
Spending too much time together almost ruined Allisen’s friendship with Nalcie. Fortunately, they were able to fix it, and then Nalcie went back to her own house. If Nalcie had stayed for longer, the two girls probably eventually would have gotten into a routine that worked for both of them—with Allisen spending some of her time with Nalcie, and still having some time to herself as well. But who knows how long it would have taken, and how many more problems they would have had, before they reached that point?
If you have a friend who is too clingy, or wanting to spend all of her time with you without giving you time to do anything else, it might be a good idea to talk to her about it. Explain, “I like you, and I have fun hanging out with you. But sometimes I need some time to myself, or some time to spend with so-and-so. I still want to hang out with you, just not all the time.” It’s important in this situation to be both honest and tactful (Lies will cause them to mistrust you once they learn the truth, and lack of tact could leave them sad, angry, hurt, or feeling like you no longer want to be around them at all).
