exclusive author notes - spoiler alert!
On this page, I give away information about how I wrote New Chance. This includes sensitive information about the plot as a whole, so if you haven't read the book yet, PLEASE don't scroll any further down this page! Instead, buy the book on Amazon, read it, and then you'll be welcome to explore this page :)
Bobby and the Methrusa Family
Bobby Methrusa was actually a character I made up long, long before I’d ever thought of Aleah. I was nine when I invented the Methrusa family, which at the time had fourteen kids, and grew to contain twenty over the next few years.
I was seventeen when I invented Aleah as someone Bobby met at college. I always had a general idea of how their friendship would progress, and while I altered a few details here and there to better fit the story, nothing major was changed when I wrote New Chance.
Two of my very favorite moments in New Chance are when Aleah tells Bobby her story in the car, and the very last Bobby/Aleah scene in the book, when they’re outside at the wedding. Funny thing about that scene—I came up with it based on the cover. The covers for the entire series were all designed before I was even done writing New Life, and I always LOVED the New Chance cover. I decided, “Hey, why not fit this scene into the book somewhere?” and I am so glad that I did, because I absolutely love it.
I was seventeen when I invented Aleah as someone Bobby met at college. I always had a general idea of how their friendship would progress, and while I altered a few details here and there to better fit the story, nothing major was changed when I wrote New Chance.
Two of my very favorite moments in New Chance are when Aleah tells Bobby her story in the car, and the very last Bobby/Aleah scene in the book, when they’re outside at the wedding. Funny thing about that scene—I came up with it based on the cover. The covers for the entire series were all designed before I was even done writing New Life, and I always LOVED the New Chance cover. I decided, “Hey, why not fit this scene into the book somewhere?” and I am so glad that I did, because I absolutely love it.
click here to see a list of the original Methrusa family members
This is a list of all the original Methrusa kids, with how old they all would be when Bobby is eighteen.
Oliver, 20
Bobby, 18
Kathlyn, 17
Michael, 16
Kaylee, 15
Katelyn, 15
Peter, 14
Johnny, 12
Michaela, 11
Joe, 10
Danny, 10
Jennifer, 9
Kayla, 8
Amanda, 7
David, 6
Maria, 6
Beth, 6
Steven, 5 (adopted)
Patric, 5
Olivia, 4 (adopted)
I was a lot younger when I came up with this version of the family, which accounts for all the similar names (would any parent really want to have a Kaylee, Kayla, and Michaela all in the same family?) and the fact that a family that already had 18 kids would be allowed to adopt two more. Before I started writing New Chance, I realized I’d have to change a few things.
I still wanted Bobby to have a lot of siblings, but I didn’t want it to be so many that everyone would have heard of his family. I cut down on the numbers and merged a few personalities together to create new people. I knew I was keeping Olivia exactly the same (except not adopted), and I knew I wanted Bobby to still have one older brother (I changed his name to Oscar because Oliver and Olivia are similar), but everyone else got new identities.
Oliver, 20
Bobby, 18
Kathlyn, 17
Michael, 16
Kaylee, 15
Katelyn, 15
Peter, 14
Johnny, 12
Michaela, 11
Joe, 10
Danny, 10
Jennifer, 9
Kayla, 8
Amanda, 7
David, 6
Maria, 6
Beth, 6
Steven, 5 (adopted)
Patric, 5
Olivia, 4 (adopted)
I was a lot younger when I came up with this version of the family, which accounts for all the similar names (would any parent really want to have a Kaylee, Kayla, and Michaela all in the same family?) and the fact that a family that already had 18 kids would be allowed to adopt two more. Before I started writing New Chance, I realized I’d have to change a few things.
I still wanted Bobby to have a lot of siblings, but I didn’t want it to be so many that everyone would have heard of his family. I cut down on the numbers and merged a few personalities together to create new people. I knew I was keeping Olivia exactly the same (except not adopted), and I knew I wanted Bobby to still have one older brother (I changed his name to Oscar because Oliver and Olivia are similar), but everyone else got new identities.
Rebecca
Funny thing about Rebecca – she didn’t even exist until I started writing Chapter 5. Once I wrote that chapter, I realized, “Hmm, I think this girl could play a major role in the book as a whole” and revised the plot to include her. What’s really funny is that Lauren didn’t even exist until I started writing Chapter 5 of New Life. I guess Chapter 5 is the magic number; I wonder who we’ll meet in Chapter 5 of New Love!
Sometimes timing is everything when it comes to writing. If I’d immediately started writing New Chance as soon as I finished New Life, Rebecca’s story probably would have been written in a stilted, unrealistic way, if at all. It was the February before I wrote New Chance that I attended my first college party – I was visiting my brother’s school in North Carolina, and we went to a party with some friends. Although it wasn’t the kind of place I’d choose to hang out on a regular basis, I’m glad I went, because that party was exactly what I was envisioning as I described the party Aleah went to pick Rebecca up from.
Sometimes timing is everything when it comes to writing. If I’d immediately started writing New Chance as soon as I finished New Life, Rebecca’s story probably would have been written in a stilted, unrealistic way, if at all. It was the February before I wrote New Chance that I attended my first college party – I was visiting my brother’s school in North Carolina, and we went to a party with some friends. Although it wasn’t the kind of place I’d choose to hang out on a regular basis, I’m glad I went, because that party was exactly what I was envisioning as I described the party Aleah went to pick Rebecca up from.
|
I don't have any pictures of the party itself, but to the left is a picture of my brother and me on his college campus during that visit! To the left is a quote he had posted in his room. I included it here because it fits with the theme of New Chance. |
|
Lauren's Story
When I first came up with the idea for the New Life series, Lauren didn't even exist. Even when I invented her in Chapter 5 of New Life, I had NO idea that she'd end up becoming a main character in New Chance. But when I got toward the end of New Life, Lauren's story seemed unfinished somehow. I felt like there was a lot more that could be explored about what happened to her afterwards.
I have a distinct memory of trying to write out a bullet-point plot doc of what would happen in New Chance, back when I only had about twenty chapters of New Life written. Even at that time, I could tell that what I had was extremely minimal and would need more "meat". Deciding to implement Lauren as a main character solved this issue.
I have a distinct memory of trying to write out a bullet-point plot doc of what would happen in New Chance, back when I only had about twenty chapters of New Life written. Even at that time, I could tell that what I had was extremely minimal and would need more "meat". Deciding to implement Lauren as a main character solved this issue.
click here to read my original plot of New Chance (as of Fall 2015):
- Proposal (aleah’s perspective)
- Bobby preparing for school
- Bobby emails mentees
- Aleah starts school
- Aleah meets bobby and likes him
- Bobby goes home thinking about her
- 2nd meet
- “hi Aleah”
- 3rd meet
- Lunch together—talk majors etc
- 4th meet—Bobby sees pic of kids, finds out
- Bobby goes home like “what?”
- Aleah goes home sad
- Awkward, avoiding each other, yet thinking about each other
- Halloween—bobby meets Austin and anna
- See each other at school, Bobby comments
- Before thanksgiving or Christmas vacation, they talk about their plans
- Semester 2—class together. Nooo!!!
- Talk in class
- Bobby follows Aleah
- Bobby suggests carpool
- First carpool
- More carpool
- Aleah tells Bobby full story
- Austin’s birthday, Bobby gives gift
- Aleah is happy with Bobby as friend
- Mom and Steve wedding where Aleah invites Bobby and they hang out as friends
Lauren’s experiences at Fox Street were definitely some of my favorite parts to write. I drew heavily from my own experiences working in a middle-school special education program much like the one Lauren works in. Although the individual characters and events are fictional, the behaviors as a whole definitely have basis in reality. The “you look like a” comments were especially popular with the group of eighth-graders I worked with my first year, and Mason’s attitude of “What? I’m innocent!”, as well as his short-lived explosions, are characteristics of many students I’ve known. Mason’s interactions with Paul were based on my own observations too – I saw so many cases in which pairing an academically-capable, behaviorally-challenged student with a lower-functioning student was a perfect solution for both children.
some funny middle-school exchanges from real life
As a school staff member, there are hundreds of moments where a kid says or does something that you know you shouldn't laugh at, but... it's hard. Throughout my five years of teaching/assisting in middle schools, I had a LOT of these moments. I wrote several of them down in a document on my phone titled "I should not laugh." Whenever I need a good laugh, I pull the document up and read through it!
Here are a few excerpts from my "I should not laugh" document:
At the beginning of class <student> was singing a song about "I wish all my friends were apples, then I could eat them." Then he said, "would that be weird?" and Mrs. <teacher> was saying about how it wouldn't be weird if he went to the store and bought apples and called them his friends and ate them, but if <student's friend> turned into an apple apple and <student> ate him that would be weird.
<Student> said something and Mrs. <teacher> said " You get a bonus point for that." <Different student> said, "you look like a bonus point!" Mrs. <teacher> gave him an odd look and said, "Okay, you lose a point for saying that because that didn't even make sense!"
Mr.<teacher> popped his head in and said, "It's Friday!" <Student> said, "You look like a Friday!" Mr. <teacher> said, "I guess I look pretty good then!"
The class was pretty chatty, and then right as they reached a lull in the conversation <student> said very clearly, "I'm psycho."
Student 1: "I'm deleting my tiktok"
Student 2: "Why?"
Student 1: "Because it's stupid"
Student 3: "So? You're stupid and we don't delete you."
In math, <student> was saying stuff about how he wanted <other student> to stop calling him silly names (like Barney). I said, "well why don't you tell him that you want him to stop calling you names?" and he turned around and yelled at<other student>, "Hey! Mr. T-bone!" There was literally no way for me to stop myself from laughing and it took me almost a minute to compose myself. I explained, laughing, that you can't expect someone to stop calling you a name if you're calling them a name to get their attention!
There are many, many more entries in that document, but some of them are only funny if you know the students, and others I'd rather save to potentially use in future books ;)
Here are a few excerpts from my "I should not laugh" document:
At the beginning of class <student> was singing a song about "I wish all my friends were apples, then I could eat them." Then he said, "would that be weird?" and Mrs. <teacher> was saying about how it wouldn't be weird if he went to the store and bought apples and called them his friends and ate them, but if <student's friend> turned into an apple apple and <student> ate him that would be weird.
<Student> said something and Mrs. <teacher> said " You get a bonus point for that." <Different student> said, "you look like a bonus point!" Mrs. <teacher> gave him an odd look and said, "Okay, you lose a point for saying that because that didn't even make sense!"
Mr.<teacher> popped his head in and said, "It's Friday!" <Student> said, "You look like a Friday!" Mr. <teacher> said, "I guess I look pretty good then!"
The class was pretty chatty, and then right as they reached a lull in the conversation <student> said very clearly, "I'm psycho."
Student 1: "I'm deleting my tiktok"
Student 2: "Why?"
Student 1: "Because it's stupid"
Student 3: "So? You're stupid and we don't delete you."
In math, <student> was saying stuff about how he wanted <other student> to stop calling him silly names (like Barney). I said, "well why don't you tell him that you want him to stop calling you names?" and he turned around and yelled at<other student>, "Hey! Mr. T-bone!" There was literally no way for me to stop myself from laughing and it took me almost a minute to compose myself. I explained, laughing, that you can't expect someone to stop calling you a name if you're calling them a name to get their attention!
There are many, many more entries in that document, but some of them are only funny if you know the students, and others I'd rather save to potentially use in future books ;)
St. Agatha and Fox Street
When writing a book that takes place in a certain setting, it's always easier if that setting is someplace you're familiar with. I consciously based St. Agatha University off of the college I attended, Rivier University. Like St. Agatha, Rivier is a small private school with an approximately equal commuter-resident ratio. The e-classroom is a real room at Rivier, set up exactly how I describe it in New Chance. When I was writing the St. Agatha scenes, I was envisioning them taking place in specific locations on the Rivier campus. (I described the St. Agatha buildings as limestone rather than brick, because New Chance takes place in Indiana, where buildings are usually built with limestone.) Even Dipper's ice cream stand can be mapped to a real ice cream place my friends and I used to visit all the time!
Similarly, when I was writing the Fox Street scenes, I was picturing them taking place at Elm Street Middle School, where I worked for three years. The 8-shaped hallway layout, the para lunchroom, even Lauren's lunch taking place at 11:47-- all of that was taken directly from Elm Street.
Similarly, when I was writing the Fox Street scenes, I was picturing them taking place at Elm Street Middle School, where I worked for three years. The 8-shaped hallway layout, the para lunchroom, even Lauren's lunch taking place at 11:47-- all of that was taken directly from Elm Street.
The outside of the library at Rivier University (2013)
|
I don't have many pictures from Rivier, but here is one from when I brought my brother Cody to the dining hall in 2018.
|
Elm Street Middle School, 2017
|
The Writing Process
I wrote the very first chapter before New Life was even published, but then took a break from the series for a year and a half. I was a little nervous to write New Chance, because New Life had been so well-received and I wanted to make sure the second book lived up to everyone's expectations.
I kept putting off writing it, until March 2019, when I decided, "I just need to get this book done!" I implemented a schedule where I had to write New Chance for two hours every day, no matter what. I did not go back and edit anything, I just kept plowing through the book until it was all done. It took me about two months to finish the first draft.
I kept putting off writing it, until March 2019, when I decided, "I just need to get this book done!" I implemented a schedule where I had to write New Chance for two hours every day, no matter what. I did not go back and edit anything, I just kept plowing through the book until it was all done. It took me about two months to finish the first draft.
To be honest, I kind of dreaded the first read-through, because I thought the book would be an absolute TRAIN WRECK! But it wasn't. It had several scenes that needed to be re-worked or deleted entirely, but on the whole, it wasn't bad. I did a pretty intense round of edits that summer, chopping out 20,000 words of what had been a 150,000-word manuscript, and merging, deleting, and rearranging several chapters. Then I let the book sit for eight months. In spring 2020, I did another round of edits, cutting out more words but not needing to change any plot elements.
Below, I have included a few scenes from my first draft. When I write first drafts, I usually just envision what the characters would be doing, and write out all the details. Later on, I tend to realize that some of the details aren't necessary to the story, so I remove them.
Below, I have included a few scenes from my first draft. When I write first drafts, I usually just envision what the characters would be doing, and write out all the details. Later on, I tend to realize that some of the details aren't necessary to the story, so I remove them.
The original beginning of chapter 15
“You must be Lauren.”
Lauren turned at the sound of her name to see a short older woman smiling at her. “That’s me,” she told the woman with a smile. “I was told that this was where I was supposed to go?”
“It sure is. I’m Monique Denison, one of the secretaries. I’m going to take you into my office and we’ll snap a picture of you for your ID badge. Then we’ll send it over to HR, and if all goes well, you’ll have your badge by the end of the week.”
Lauren followed the Monique, eager to get all the <documentation> taken care of as quickly as possible so she could start working with the students. Lauren had received a call from Mr. Steer only a day after her interview, saying that she was being offered the job. She had immediately accepted it, and, after hanging up, let out a loud whoop of exultation. “Thank You, God!” she had cried, doing a silly little happy dance right there in her living room. She hadn’t been allowed to start right away—first she’d had to fill out some paperwork, get fingerprinted at the police station, and submit some forms of identification so that a background check could be run. But today, finally, she could start working.
At least she’d thought she would get to. Lauren tried not to appear impatient as Monique fumbled around with a camera, then moved a few things around, adjusted the lighting, and started poking around on the camera again. “Sorry,” Monique apologized. “I’m not usually the one who does this. I just need to—ah, okay. Now we’re all set. I think.” She directed Lauren to stand in front of the wall across from her. “Right there… a little more to the left… can you crouch down just a little… ah, that’s good. Okay, smile!”
Lauren smiled, and the flash of the camera went off, almost blinding her. “Beautiful!” Monique exclaimed. “Come on over and take a look. I think it looks good, but if you don’t like it, we can take another one. This is the picture that’ll be on your ID badge for as long as you work here.”
The picture looked fine. Lauren told her so, and Monique set the camera down and pulled a lanyard down from the wall. Attached to the lanyard was a set of keys and a plastic ID badge that simply read “Fox Street 3.”
“I’m giving you one of our sub badges for now,” Monique explained, handing the lanyard to Lauren. “The keys will work on any classroom in the building, as well as the teacher’s’ cafeteria and the library. It won’t work on the gym or student cafeteria, so if you ever need to get in there for whatever reason, you’ll have to ask a custodian. The badge will let you get into the building at any time between six a.m. and seven7 p.m. Make sure you have it with you at all times.”
Lauren nodded and placed the lanyard around her neck. Monique explained a few other things and then printed something out from her computer. “Your schedule,” she said, handing it to Lauren.
Lauren studied the schedule, suddenly feeling like she was back in college, receiving her list of courses, professors, and class times. She had math twice a day, once in the morning and once in the afternoon. She also had reading, science, social studies, art, and life skills. Lunch was at 11:30, and the school day lasted from 8:00 to 2:45. It looked like each class period was about fifty minutes long.
“You don’t have anywhere to be for homeroom, so unless someone tells you otherwise, you can have the first twelve minutes of the day to yourself,” Monique told her. “Most of the paras use that time to check their email. You probably don’t have a computer account yet, but once you get one, you’ll be able to log in to any computer in the building. And your school email will take the same username and password.”
“Sounds easy.” Lauren was getting antsy. “Should I go to my first class now?”
“Check with Richard first, just to make sure. He told me to give you a quick briefing, but he might want to fill you in on some things himself.”
The principal’s office was next door to Monique’s, so Lauren didn’t have to go far to find Richard Steer. He shook her hand and asked her if she knew where she was going. When she replied that she could just follow the signs in the hallways that pointed out where to go for various ranges of classroom numbers, he nodded approvingly and applauded her resourcefulness. “The classroom teachers should be able to fill you in on everything that pertains to their particular classrooms and students,” he told her. “I don’t expect that you’ll have any trouble assimilating or learning the ropes, but if you ever need to speak with me about anything, you know where to find me.”
Lauren thanked him and headed out on her way. Fox Street School was a two-story building, and her first class was located on the second floor, in room 219. She took the stairs, followed the signs leading to rooms 210-220, and easily located the room.
First period had already started, so Lauren was quiet as she eased the door open and slipped inside. But she wasn’t quiet enough, because eight heads immediately swung in her direction.
“Who are you?” a boy in the back row called out. He was pudgy, with blond hair and glasses.
“Are you Dakota’s mom?” a girl with Down syndrome features asked.
“That’s not my mom, stupid!” shouted a red-haired boy who was sitting at a desk set apart from the others. The Down syndrome girl’s face crumpled up and she started to cry.
“Don’t call Lydia stupid, you fat jerk! She works harder than all of us!” A black boy in the front turned around to glare at the red-haired boy.
What have I gotten myself into? Lauren wondered, staring around at the class as kids continued to call out, shout at one another, and cause a general ruckus. A small boy jumped out of his seat and ran over to the pencil sharpener in the corner of the classroom. Another boy put his hands over his ears and started rocking back and forth. A girl took her phone out and started taking selfies.
“Boys and girls!” A stern female voice rang out from the front of the room. Lauren looked to see Etta, the English teacher from her interview, staring the class down with an enraged expression. “Is this how we behave in reading class?”
Lauren turned at the sound of her name to see a short older woman smiling at her. “That’s me,” she told the woman with a smile. “I was told that this was where I was supposed to go?”
“It sure is. I’m Monique Denison, one of the secretaries. I’m going to take you into my office and we’ll snap a picture of you for your ID badge. Then we’ll send it over to HR, and if all goes well, you’ll have your badge by the end of the week.”
Lauren followed the Monique, eager to get all the <documentation> taken care of as quickly as possible so she could start working with the students. Lauren had received a call from Mr. Steer only a day after her interview, saying that she was being offered the job. She had immediately accepted it, and, after hanging up, let out a loud whoop of exultation. “Thank You, God!” she had cried, doing a silly little happy dance right there in her living room. She hadn’t been allowed to start right away—first she’d had to fill out some paperwork, get fingerprinted at the police station, and submit some forms of identification so that a background check could be run. But today, finally, she could start working.
At least she’d thought she would get to. Lauren tried not to appear impatient as Monique fumbled around with a camera, then moved a few things around, adjusted the lighting, and started poking around on the camera again. “Sorry,” Monique apologized. “I’m not usually the one who does this. I just need to—ah, okay. Now we’re all set. I think.” She directed Lauren to stand in front of the wall across from her. “Right there… a little more to the left… can you crouch down just a little… ah, that’s good. Okay, smile!”
Lauren smiled, and the flash of the camera went off, almost blinding her. “Beautiful!” Monique exclaimed. “Come on over and take a look. I think it looks good, but if you don’t like it, we can take another one. This is the picture that’ll be on your ID badge for as long as you work here.”
The picture looked fine. Lauren told her so, and Monique set the camera down and pulled a lanyard down from the wall. Attached to the lanyard was a set of keys and a plastic ID badge that simply read “Fox Street 3.”
“I’m giving you one of our sub badges for now,” Monique explained, handing the lanyard to Lauren. “The keys will work on any classroom in the building, as well as the teacher’s’ cafeteria and the library. It won’t work on the gym or student cafeteria, so if you ever need to get in there for whatever reason, you’ll have to ask a custodian. The badge will let you get into the building at any time between six a.m. and seven7 p.m. Make sure you have it with you at all times.”
Lauren nodded and placed the lanyard around her neck. Monique explained a few other things and then printed something out from her computer. “Your schedule,” she said, handing it to Lauren.
Lauren studied the schedule, suddenly feeling like she was back in college, receiving her list of courses, professors, and class times. She had math twice a day, once in the morning and once in the afternoon. She also had reading, science, social studies, art, and life skills. Lunch was at 11:30, and the school day lasted from 8:00 to 2:45. It looked like each class period was about fifty minutes long.
“You don’t have anywhere to be for homeroom, so unless someone tells you otherwise, you can have the first twelve minutes of the day to yourself,” Monique told her. “Most of the paras use that time to check their email. You probably don’t have a computer account yet, but once you get one, you’ll be able to log in to any computer in the building. And your school email will take the same username and password.”
“Sounds easy.” Lauren was getting antsy. “Should I go to my first class now?”
“Check with Richard first, just to make sure. He told me to give you a quick briefing, but he might want to fill you in on some things himself.”
The principal’s office was next door to Monique’s, so Lauren didn’t have to go far to find Richard Steer. He shook her hand and asked her if she knew where she was going. When she replied that she could just follow the signs in the hallways that pointed out where to go for various ranges of classroom numbers, he nodded approvingly and applauded her resourcefulness. “The classroom teachers should be able to fill you in on everything that pertains to their particular classrooms and students,” he told her. “I don’t expect that you’ll have any trouble assimilating or learning the ropes, but if you ever need to speak with me about anything, you know where to find me.”
Lauren thanked him and headed out on her way. Fox Street School was a two-story building, and her first class was located on the second floor, in room 219. She took the stairs, followed the signs leading to rooms 210-220, and easily located the room.
First period had already started, so Lauren was quiet as she eased the door open and slipped inside. But she wasn’t quiet enough, because eight heads immediately swung in her direction.
“Who are you?” a boy in the back row called out. He was pudgy, with blond hair and glasses.
“Are you Dakota’s mom?” a girl with Down syndrome features asked.
“That’s not my mom, stupid!” shouted a red-haired boy who was sitting at a desk set apart from the others. The Down syndrome girl’s face crumpled up and she started to cry.
“Don’t call Lydia stupid, you fat jerk! She works harder than all of us!” A black boy in the front turned around to glare at the red-haired boy.
What have I gotten myself into? Lauren wondered, staring around at the class as kids continued to call out, shout at one another, and cause a general ruckus. A small boy jumped out of his seat and ran over to the pencil sharpener in the corner of the classroom. Another boy put his hands over his ears and started rocking back and forth. A girl took her phone out and started taking selfies.
“Boys and girls!” A stern female voice rang out from the front of the room. Lauren looked to see Etta, the English teacher from her interview, staring the class down with an enraged expression. “Is this how we behave in reading class?”
The Original Beginning of Chapter 51
Bobby had done everything he could. That’s what he kept telling himself.
Aleah had asked him to leave her alone for a couple of weeks, so she could have some time to think. It hadn’t been easy, but Bobby had done it. For the last two and a half weeks—five class periods together—he had completely ignored her. Pretended she wasn’t even in the room. He and Aleah had both entered and left class as if they were strangers, not knowing or caring that the other was there.
At first he’d assumed she had meant what she’d said; that she’d talk with him after she’d had some time to think. But he was beginning to lose hope. And he had to face the truth: maybe Aleah, for whatever reason, just didn’t want to be his friend. Ever.
“Have a good day at school, kiddos,” Bobby waved to sleepy-eyed Myla, Adam, Bridget, and Nicholas, who were just entering the kitchen for breakfast.
“You’re leaving already?” Myla looked surprised. “It’s only seven-forty!”
Since the beginning of second semester, Bobby had been leaving the house around eight o’clock. This usually allowed plenty of time for him to make it to his nine o’clock class—the one he had with Aleah—but it had snowed the night before, meaning that there were sure to be some snowbanks in the parking lots. “There are going to be fewer parking spaces available at my school today,” he told his sister. “And I need to stop for gas.”
“I wish our bus would have to stop for gas sometime,” Adam mused. “That would be cool, to stop at the gas station on the way to school. Maybe the bus driver would let us get Slurpees if we stopped at 7-Eleven.”
Bobby headed out to his car, leaving his siblings to ponder excitedly about the idea of Slurpees on the way to school. He turned his car on, then sat for a moment, waiting for the engine to heat up. Dear God, he prayed as he waited. Please let Aleah talk to me today. And if she doesn’t… well, just help me to know whether I should keep waiting or move on. And if I have to move on… help me to let her go. He didn’t want to spend the rest of his life pining after someone who wanted nothing to do with him.
He just wished he knew why she wanted nothing to do with him. Was it because he knew she had kids? Or was it because of what had happened right before he found out about her kids—him asking her out? Was she afraid he’d ask her out again?
Dumb reason to end a friendship, if so, he thought. She could’ve just told me she only saw me as a friend, and I would’ve respected that.
Bobby drove slowly through his neighborhood, paying more attention to his thoughts than to his surroundings. So much so, in fact, that he almost rear-ended a small silver car that was stopped at a stop sign.
Pay attention, fool! Bobby reprimanded himself. The car in front of him started driving, the driver seemingly unaware that he or she had just nearly been hit from behind. Bobby followed, grateful for this fact. The last thing he needed was to be yelled at by some angry neighbor.
He really needed to stop thinking about Aleah. It wasn’t just pointless—it could be dangerous.
Bobby turned the radio on and flipped to the local Christian station. Bobby hadn’t grown up listening to Christian music—his parents were more into the classic rock of the ‘70s and 80’s. But he’d discovered 98.2 LIFE by accident shortly after he’d gotten his driver’s license, and even though he’d never heard of Casting Crowns or Francesca Battistelli or the Afters, he’d quickly fallen in love with their music.
Today it was a song by MercyMe, “Word of God Speak.” Bobby knew the song well—he was pretty sure he’d even had it on a playlist of favorites a while back. But a line from the second verse got to him every time: All that I need is to be with You, and in the quiet hear Your voice.
Hear God’s voice. Bobby wished he knew how.
Aleah had asked him to leave her alone for a couple of weeks, so she could have some time to think. It hadn’t been easy, but Bobby had done it. For the last two and a half weeks—five class periods together—he had completely ignored her. Pretended she wasn’t even in the room. He and Aleah had both entered and left class as if they were strangers, not knowing or caring that the other was there.
At first he’d assumed she had meant what she’d said; that she’d talk with him after she’d had some time to think. But he was beginning to lose hope. And he had to face the truth: maybe Aleah, for whatever reason, just didn’t want to be his friend. Ever.
“Have a good day at school, kiddos,” Bobby waved to sleepy-eyed Myla, Adam, Bridget, and Nicholas, who were just entering the kitchen for breakfast.
“You’re leaving already?” Myla looked surprised. “It’s only seven-forty!”
Since the beginning of second semester, Bobby had been leaving the house around eight o’clock. This usually allowed plenty of time for him to make it to his nine o’clock class—the one he had with Aleah—but it had snowed the night before, meaning that there were sure to be some snowbanks in the parking lots. “There are going to be fewer parking spaces available at my school today,” he told his sister. “And I need to stop for gas.”
“I wish our bus would have to stop for gas sometime,” Adam mused. “That would be cool, to stop at the gas station on the way to school. Maybe the bus driver would let us get Slurpees if we stopped at 7-Eleven.”
Bobby headed out to his car, leaving his siblings to ponder excitedly about the idea of Slurpees on the way to school. He turned his car on, then sat for a moment, waiting for the engine to heat up. Dear God, he prayed as he waited. Please let Aleah talk to me today. And if she doesn’t… well, just help me to know whether I should keep waiting or move on. And if I have to move on… help me to let her go. He didn’t want to spend the rest of his life pining after someone who wanted nothing to do with him.
He just wished he knew why she wanted nothing to do with him. Was it because he knew she had kids? Or was it because of what had happened right before he found out about her kids—him asking her out? Was she afraid he’d ask her out again?
Dumb reason to end a friendship, if so, he thought. She could’ve just told me she only saw me as a friend, and I would’ve respected that.
Bobby drove slowly through his neighborhood, paying more attention to his thoughts than to his surroundings. So much so, in fact, that he almost rear-ended a small silver car that was stopped at a stop sign.
Pay attention, fool! Bobby reprimanded himself. The car in front of him started driving, the driver seemingly unaware that he or she had just nearly been hit from behind. Bobby followed, grateful for this fact. The last thing he needed was to be yelled at by some angry neighbor.
He really needed to stop thinking about Aleah. It wasn’t just pointless—it could be dangerous.
Bobby turned the radio on and flipped to the local Christian station. Bobby hadn’t grown up listening to Christian music—his parents were more into the classic rock of the ‘70s and 80’s. But he’d discovered 98.2 LIFE by accident shortly after he’d gotten his driver’s license, and even though he’d never heard of Casting Crowns or Francesca Battistelli or the Afters, he’d quickly fallen in love with their music.
Today it was a song by MercyMe, “Word of God Speak.” Bobby knew the song well—he was pretty sure he’d even had it on a playlist of favorites a while back. But a line from the second verse got to him every time: All that I need is to be with You, and in the quiet hear Your voice.
Hear God’s voice. Bobby wished he knew how.
The original beginning of chapter 63
This beginning almost made it to publication. I changed it at the last minute because I felt it was too clinical and contrived.
“Lauren Bradka! Just the person I wanted to see.”
Lauren turned around on her way out of school to see who was speaking. It was Holly Rhodes, the special ed social studies teacher. Lauren didn’t have any classes with her, so the two of them had had minimal interaction throughout the school year. Lauren walked toward her, wondering why Holly wanted to see her.
“You follow the sixth-grade group to three of their classes, right?” Holly asked without preface.
“I used to,” Lauren told her. “Now it’s just two.”
“No matter. You’ve seen this group in different settings since the beginning of the year, right?”
“Ever since I started in September.”
“Okay. Well, the reason I’m asking is, I’m Mason’s case manager. I have to write his new IEP pretty soon, so I’m trying to gather information about how he’s doing in all his classes, how his behavior’s been, that kind of stuff. I wrote down my observations and asked his other teachers to share theirs, but we all only see him one period a day. I figured since you’re with him for several periods a day, you might have some valuable information to share.”
“Oh,” said Lauren. That made sense. Every student identified for special education had an IEP—an Individualized Education Program. It was a document that detailed how they were currently performing academically, functionally, and behaviorally, and listed the goals they’d be working on over the course of the next calendar year, as well as what supports they’d be receiving in the classroom to compensate for their disabilities. IEPs were required to be updated yearly.
“You don’t have to tell me everything now,” Holly had mistaken Lauren’s thinking for hesitance. “In fact, I’d prefer if you’d just send me an email at some point in the upcoming days, because if you tell me in person I’ll probably forget half of it before I have a chance to write it down!” She laughed and shook her head. “We just barely got his three-year evaluation done in time.”
“Three-year evaluation?” Lauren had heard the term being tossed around among the teachers, but she wasn’t entirely sure what it meant. “Is that why I had to cover for Etta the other day?” The English teacher had had to attend a meeting during first period a few days before, and Lauren had been assigned to teach the sixth-graders in her place. Subbing didn’t freak her out the way it used to. She knew the kids, the kids knew her, and although they were always apt to be a little more misbehaved when the regular teacher was out of the room, they all respected Lauren.
Holly nodded. “If it was during first period on Monday, then yes. We had his evaluation meeting and determined that he’s still eligible for services. No surprise there.”
“So a three-year evaluation is what determines if a student still qualifies for special ed? Is it based on test scores or something?” Lauren had a hard time imagining Mason failing any test, unless he wrote joke answers on purpose or refused to take it or something.
“Test scores, questionnaire results, a classroom observation… there are a lot of components, and they’re different depending on what disability the child has. For example, for someone like Paul or Jeffrey, we’d want to fill out a questionnaire about their adaptive behavior and life skills—personal hygiene and whether they can cross the street safely and things like that. Someone like Mason obviously doesn’t need that particular test.”
“What kind of test did he need?” The hallways were clear now, the students having left the building and the teachers having retreated to their rooms for end-of-the-day cleanup and lesson planning. Paras weren’t required to stay any later than the students, but Lauren wasn’t in any hurry to go home. She was interested in learning about the special ed process—especially as it related to her favorite student.
“Well, we always have to give an academic test and an IQ test—he scored very well on both of those, as I’m sure you’re not surprised to hear. Then, since Mason is identified with an Emotional/Behavioral Disturbance, the school psych administered a lengthy questionnaire about things like how he perceives himself compared to others, and how he feels about certain things, and other questions relating to mental health.”
“Huh,” said Lauren. “And what were the results like on that one?”
Holly regarded her grimly. “Well, a lot of his answers seemed a little… fake. Like he was trying too hard to make things seem better than they were. But even so… his results lined up alarmingly closely with kids on the severe end of the depression spectrum.”
Lauren stared at her, certain she hadn’t heard right. “Depression? Mason? He’s not depressed. He gets angry easily, sure, but he’s mostly a happy kid.”
“He keeps it stuffed inside,” said Holly sadly. “His guidance counselor and I have had numerous conversations about this. She calls him to her office for about twenty minutes every week, to check in and see how things are going. And she said it’s always the same thing. He always has these huge walls up around himself, always pretends like he’s so superior and he’s the one all the kids look up to. But that’s not how he really feels about himself.”
“Lauren Bradka! Just the person I wanted to see.”
Lauren turned around on her way out of school to see who was speaking. It was Holly Rhodes, the special ed social studies teacher. Lauren didn’t have any classes with her, so the two of them had had minimal interaction throughout the school year. Lauren walked toward her, wondering why Holly wanted to see her.
“You follow the sixth-grade group to three of their classes, right?” Holly asked without preface.
“I used to,” Lauren told her. “Now it’s just two.”
“No matter. You’ve seen this group in different settings since the beginning of the year, right?”
“Ever since I started in September.”
“Okay. Well, the reason I’m asking is, I’m Mason’s case manager. I have to write his new IEP pretty soon, so I’m trying to gather information about how he’s doing in all his classes, how his behavior’s been, that kind of stuff. I wrote down my observations and asked his other teachers to share theirs, but we all only see him one period a day. I figured since you’re with him for several periods a day, you might have some valuable information to share.”
“Oh,” said Lauren. That made sense. Every student identified for special education had an IEP—an Individualized Education Program. It was a document that detailed how they were currently performing academically, functionally, and behaviorally, and listed the goals they’d be working on over the course of the next calendar year, as well as what supports they’d be receiving in the classroom to compensate for their disabilities. IEPs were required to be updated yearly.
“You don’t have to tell me everything now,” Holly had mistaken Lauren’s thinking for hesitance. “In fact, I’d prefer if you’d just send me an email at some point in the upcoming days, because if you tell me in person I’ll probably forget half of it before I have a chance to write it down!” She laughed and shook her head. “We just barely got his three-year evaluation done in time.”
“Three-year evaluation?” Lauren had heard the term being tossed around among the teachers, but she wasn’t entirely sure what it meant. “Is that why I had to cover for Etta the other day?” The English teacher had had to attend a meeting during first period a few days before, and Lauren had been assigned to teach the sixth-graders in her place. Subbing didn’t freak her out the way it used to. She knew the kids, the kids knew her, and although they were always apt to be a little more misbehaved when the regular teacher was out of the room, they all respected Lauren.
Holly nodded. “If it was during first period on Monday, then yes. We had his evaluation meeting and determined that he’s still eligible for services. No surprise there.”
“So a three-year evaluation is what determines if a student still qualifies for special ed? Is it based on test scores or something?” Lauren had a hard time imagining Mason failing any test, unless he wrote joke answers on purpose or refused to take it or something.
“Test scores, questionnaire results, a classroom observation… there are a lot of components, and they’re different depending on what disability the child has. For example, for someone like Paul or Jeffrey, we’d want to fill out a questionnaire about their adaptive behavior and life skills—personal hygiene and whether they can cross the street safely and things like that. Someone like Mason obviously doesn’t need that particular test.”
“What kind of test did he need?” The hallways were clear now, the students having left the building and the teachers having retreated to their rooms for end-of-the-day cleanup and lesson planning. Paras weren’t required to stay any later than the students, but Lauren wasn’t in any hurry to go home. She was interested in learning about the special ed process—especially as it related to her favorite student.
“Well, we always have to give an academic test and an IQ test—he scored very well on both of those, as I’m sure you’re not surprised to hear. Then, since Mason is identified with an Emotional/Behavioral Disturbance, the school psych administered a lengthy questionnaire about things like how he perceives himself compared to others, and how he feels about certain things, and other questions relating to mental health.”
“Huh,” said Lauren. “And what were the results like on that one?”
Holly regarded her grimly. “Well, a lot of his answers seemed a little… fake. Like he was trying too hard to make things seem better than they were. But even so… his results lined up alarmingly closely with kids on the severe end of the depression spectrum.”
Lauren stared at her, certain she hadn’t heard right. “Depression? Mason? He’s not depressed. He gets angry easily, sure, but he’s mostly a happy kid.”
“He keeps it stuffed inside,” said Holly sadly. “His guidance counselor and I have had numerous conversations about this. She calls him to her office for about twenty minutes every week, to check in and see how things are going. And she said it’s always the same thing. He always has these huge walls up around himself, always pretends like he’s so superior and he’s the one all the kids look up to. But that’s not how he really feels about himself.”
Originally, I had a scene where Aleah took her kids trick-or-treating and they ended up at Bobby's house, which was a huge surprise for both Bobby and Aleah. (This was after Bobby knew she had kids, but before they became friends again.) I decided before I was even done with the first draft that this scene would have to be cut, because I didn't want them to know they lived in the same neighborhood until later on.
During Bobby and Aleah's first time carpooling, Austin shows Bobby the "lelephant" he's holding, and Anna shows him a zebra. I intentionally picked these animals as kind of an inside joke with myself, referencing the Halloween scene, which by that time I already knew would be deleted.
During Bobby and Aleah's first time carpooling, Austin shows Bobby the "lelephant" he's holding, and Anna shows him a zebra. I intentionally picked these animals as kind of an inside joke with myself, referencing the Halloween scene, which by that time I already knew would be deleted.
Deleted scene: Halloween with Bobby and Aleah
Thirty-Five
Halloween in the Methrusa household was always a big deal. Everyone dressed up, including Bobby’s parents and all the older siblings. While the younger kids dressed as whatever they were interested in at the time, the older family members liked to follow some sort of theme. One year they’d all been characters from different movies. Another year they’d all dressed like animals. A long time ago, when Bobby was maybe eight or nine, the entire family had gone trick-or-treating as Dalmatians from the movie 101 Dalmatians.
The whole family didn’t go trick-or-treating anymore, of course. The younger kids did, usually in groups of two or three, accompanied by at least one older sibling or parent. The rest of the family stayed home, but still got in costume for the fun of it, and for the picture Bobby’s mom took every year.
“Bobbeeeeeeee!” Olivia was even more hyper than usual, dancing around Bobby as soon as he stepped through the front door. “Give me a rocket ride up to my room, Bobby! Then you can help me get dressed up in my Elsa costume!”
It had been a long, hard day for Bobby. He’d had two tests, and he was pretty sure he’d failed one of them. On top of that, although Caleb, Erin, and even Charlie were all set to meet up with him the following week for a quick peer mentor meeting, Aleah still hadn’t responded.
But his baby sister could still put him in a good mood. He found himself chuckling as Olivia clung onto his arm and started trying to climb him like a tree. “Livi, trick-or-treating doesn’t start for two more hours. Let’s hold off on the Elsa costume until it’s a little closer to that time, all right?”
“But not the rocket ride. That has to be right now!”
“That can be right now,” Bobby agreed, picking her up and zooming forward.
An hour and a half later, Bobby’s mom, dressed in a humorously ruffly pink ballerina costume, shepherded everyone into the living room to pose for the annual picture. Bobby’s dad, wearing an NBA T-shirt and shorts, stood in the back next to Oscar, who sported a baseball cap and glove. Bobby, dressed in his uniform and helmet from his days as a linebacker in high school, hurried to stand next to them.
The other tall athletes joined them in the back row—Bobby’s mom, as well as Matthew the scuba diver and Karalyn the soccer player. Shona the skydiver stood in front of them, next to Skylar the karate master, Lucas the fencer, and Myla the hockey player. The four non-athletes stood in the very front row: Nicholas the genie, Bridget the leopard, Adam the chef, and Olivia, dressed as Elsa from Frozen.
“Stay where you are!” Bobby’s mom commanded after the first flash had gone off. “I set it to take five pictures in all…”
As soon as the fifth flash had gone off, the family scattered, gathering into small groups and clusters. The older family members had planned out days ago who was walking around the neighborhood with which of the younger kids. Dad was taking Lucas and Myla; Mom was chaperoning Shona, Skylar, and one of their friends; Oscar and Matthew were teaming up to take the four little ones, and Bobby and Karalyn were staying home to work on homework while giving out candy.
“I’m cool with this arrangement,” Karalyn commented once everyone else was out the door, and she and Bobby were situated in the foyer with their laptops. Karalyn had taken a Milky Way out of the candy bar and had bitten into it. “Sit here, get stuff done, answer the door, and eat as much candy as we want? Oh yeah, this is the life.”
“As long as we don’t eat all the candy,” said Bobby, helping himself to an Almond Joy.
“Just most of it,” teased Karalyn.
“Exactly.”
The first half hour passed quickly, with the doorbell ringing every few seconds, and Bobby and Karalyn taking turns jumping up to greet the various superheroes, villains, monsters, characters, animals, and objects who came to their door. The costumes were entertaining, and even though Bobby wasn’t getting a whole lot of work done, he was having fun.
The trick-or-treaters slowed down after a bit, once all the kids from their street had moved on to the surrounding roads, and kids who lived on the surrounding roads hadn’t arrived yet. “All right,” said Bobby, checking his watch. “I’m thinking we have about… maybe fifteen or twenty minutes before it starts getting busy again, what do you say?”
“Sounds about right,” Karalyn agreed. “All right, time to focus. In all that time, I only wrote two sentences of my paper!”
“You’re doing better than I am,” Bobby chuckled. “I barely have one sentence.”
They both managed to be somewhat productive during the slow part of the night, and then the traffic picked up again and they were back to answering the door. Bobby liked living in a neighborhood like this, in which there were a lot of kids. He’d rather have a busy Halloween night than a dead one any day.
The influx of kids from surrounding towns eventually died down, and Bobby and Karalyn had a chance to get more work done. “How many sentences are you at now?” Karalyn asked, right as the doorbell rang.
It was Bobby’s turn to answer it, so he got up, giving his typed essay a quick once-over. “I’ve actually got a couple paragraphs,” he told her.
“Lucky. I keep getting stuck on this intro.”
Bobby didn’t remember what Karalyn’s paper was supposed to be about, but as he reached for the door handle he shared a trick that worked well for him. “Skip the intro for now and then come back to it. Get the real meat of your paper done first. That’s what I do.” He opened the door to see a tiny elephant and an even tinier zebra staring up at him.
“Twick or tweat!” they chorused, each holding out a small bag.
“What cute costumes,” Bobby gushed, placing two pieces of candy in each bag. When older kids came to the door, he let them choose what pieces they wanted, but with kids this little, it usually worked best if he just handed candy out.
“I’m a lelephant and she’s a zebra,” the boy spoke up. His fleecy gray elephant suit covered his whole body, complete with a hood that came halfway down his face. The hood had eye holes, with a long trunk protruding from between them.
“I zebra!” the little girl echoed. She was smaller than the boy, and the hood of her zebra costume didn’t cover her face. Bobby could see with perfect clarity her big brown eyes, her short bangs, her chubby cheeks, and her smile. Her familiar smile.
It took Bobby a moment to remember where he’d seen these kids before. The realization of who was standing on his doorstep hit him like a truck. He looked up and there, standing behind them, was Aleah.
Thirty-Six
Aleah couldn’t breathe. How was this possible? There, standing right in front of her, dressed up like a football player, was Bobby.
Aleah had known Bobby lived in Brucksdale. She’d had no idea that he lived just two streets over from her.
“Bob-Bobby,” she stammered. “Hi… I didn’t know this was your house.” She felt her cheeks flush. I sound like an idiot.
Bobby looked just as dumbstruck. “I… didn’t know you lived in this neighborhood.”
“Yeah… we talked about living in Brucksdale, but we never told each other exactly where.”
“There were a lot of things we never told each other.” Bobby seemed to regret his words as soon as they escaped his mouth. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean it that way.”
Aleah knew exactly what he’d meant. It was too late to apologize for waiting so long to tell him about her kids. He probably wouldn’t accept her apology anyway. “Austin, Anna, come on. Time to go get candy at the next house!” She kept her voice upbeat for their sake.
Austin and Anna barely seemed to hear her. They were busy petting the dog who’d come to the door—a friendly yellow guy, probably some sort of Lab mix. One of Bobby’s sisters—Katelyn? Katherine? Something like that—was sitting next to the dog, stroking his side and smiling at the kids.
Bobby stepped outside of the house, so that he was standing on the front step next to Aleah. She didn’t dare look up through his helmet at his face. She didn’t want to see the anger and disappointment there.
Dear God, please let this moment be over quickly. Please help me to stop feeling so nervous. Help me through this moment, God, please.
“Why haven’t you answered any of my texts?” Bobby asked.
Aleah shrugged.
“Are you coming to the peer mentor meeting next week? Everyone else is. If you come, it’ll be the first time all five of us have been together.”
Aleah didn’t answer. This was the first time she’d been near Bobby in over three weeks, and she didn’t like the way standing so close to him was making her feel. She’d forgotten how tall he was. How kind his voice was. His football uniform was accentuating the muscles on his arms. She’d never noticed how strong he looked. Strong but gentle.
Her heart was pounding a million miles a minute. She couldn’t read exactly how Bobby felt about her—he didn’t seem angry or disappointed, but he didn’t seem like the same friend she’d eaten lunch with all those times either. He was uncomfortable around her, the same way she was uncomfortable around him.
A thought wormed its way into her brain. What if we got past the discomfort? Could we find our way back to friendship again?
The rapid pounding of her heart was the answer to that question. Aleah knew that it wasn’t just discomfort that was making her feel this way. She’d always been attracted to Bobby, even when she hadn’t wanted to admit it. And however little sense it made, those feelings of attraction had only grown stronger in their time apart.
Aleah didn’t think she could just be friends with Bobby, not if she felt this way about him. But becoming more than friends with Bobby was a hundred percent out of the question.
“Austin. Anna. Let’s go.” Her voice came out sounding sharp, and both of her children looked up, concern in their eyes. “It’s okay,” Aleah softened her tone. “But we need to keep going. It’s going to be bedtime soon.”
“Aleah…” Bobby sounded like he didn’t know what he wanted to say.
Aleah kept her focus on her children, taking each of them by the hand and carefully helping them down Bobby’s front steps. Anna started whining, and Aleah was glad for an excuse not to engage Bobby. “What’s wrong, little princess?”
“Tired,” Anna moaned. It was no wonder. They’d been out for at least an hour, and Aleah had already started wondering whether two was a little too young for trick-or-treating.
“Well, I think it’s time to head home now. What do you think?”
“Yes!” Austin ran for the stroller Aleah had parked on the side of the road in front of Bobby’s house. It was a double stroller, and even though Austin and Anna were both getting a little too big for it, it was perfect for times like this. Austin and Anna never would have made it past their next-door neighbors’ house if they’d had to walk the whole way.
Aleah hurriedly strapped both of her children in, talking to them the entire time in an effort to discourage Bobby from talking to her. She spun the stroller around and proceeded briskly back toward her own street.
***
“You knew her?” Karalyn asked as Aleah and her kids disappeared down the street.
“Yeah,” said Bobby, with a dull ache in his chest. “I knew her.” He kept the past tense because it was clear that Aleah didn’t want to know him anymore.
“From school?”
Bobby nodded.
“She looked young. Were those her kids or is she babysitting?”
Bobby collapsed in his chair. “Her kids.”
“Are you okay?” Karalyn was giving him a concerned look. “You seem… a little off.”
“I’m just tired.” It was a lie, and Bobby felt bad about it. He was also pretty sure Karalyn could see through it. But he didn’t want to explain about Aleah at the moment. He just wanted some time alone.
He checked the time on his computer screen. “Everyone should be getting back in about fifteen minutes,” he told his sister. “Do you think you can handle the rest of the trick-or-treaters? I’m gonna go lie down.”
Karalyn eyed him skeptically. “You can just tell me what the deal is between you and that girl, you know. There’s obviously something going on.”
“Maybe sometime. I don’t want to talk about it right now.” Bobby picked up his laptop and dragged the chair back into the kitchen, where it had come from. “I’m going to my room.”
Bobby moseyed downstairs and flopped on his bed, emotionally spent. He knew he’d have to fake energy and excitement as soon as the younger kids got home and ran down to show him their loot. He might even be recruited to help with Nicholas or Bridget’s makeup removal, or to give Olivia a bath. But for right now, he didn’t feel like doing a thing. He just needed to be alone with his thoughts.
Thoughts about Aleah.
Halloween in the Methrusa household was always a big deal. Everyone dressed up, including Bobby’s parents and all the older siblings. While the younger kids dressed as whatever they were interested in at the time, the older family members liked to follow some sort of theme. One year they’d all been characters from different movies. Another year they’d all dressed like animals. A long time ago, when Bobby was maybe eight or nine, the entire family had gone trick-or-treating as Dalmatians from the movie 101 Dalmatians.
The whole family didn’t go trick-or-treating anymore, of course. The younger kids did, usually in groups of two or three, accompanied by at least one older sibling or parent. The rest of the family stayed home, but still got in costume for the fun of it, and for the picture Bobby’s mom took every year.
“Bobbeeeeeeee!” Olivia was even more hyper than usual, dancing around Bobby as soon as he stepped through the front door. “Give me a rocket ride up to my room, Bobby! Then you can help me get dressed up in my Elsa costume!”
It had been a long, hard day for Bobby. He’d had two tests, and he was pretty sure he’d failed one of them. On top of that, although Caleb, Erin, and even Charlie were all set to meet up with him the following week for a quick peer mentor meeting, Aleah still hadn’t responded.
But his baby sister could still put him in a good mood. He found himself chuckling as Olivia clung onto his arm and started trying to climb him like a tree. “Livi, trick-or-treating doesn’t start for two more hours. Let’s hold off on the Elsa costume until it’s a little closer to that time, all right?”
“But not the rocket ride. That has to be right now!”
“That can be right now,” Bobby agreed, picking her up and zooming forward.
An hour and a half later, Bobby’s mom, dressed in a humorously ruffly pink ballerina costume, shepherded everyone into the living room to pose for the annual picture. Bobby’s dad, wearing an NBA T-shirt and shorts, stood in the back next to Oscar, who sported a baseball cap and glove. Bobby, dressed in his uniform and helmet from his days as a linebacker in high school, hurried to stand next to them.
The other tall athletes joined them in the back row—Bobby’s mom, as well as Matthew the scuba diver and Karalyn the soccer player. Shona the skydiver stood in front of them, next to Skylar the karate master, Lucas the fencer, and Myla the hockey player. The four non-athletes stood in the very front row: Nicholas the genie, Bridget the leopard, Adam the chef, and Olivia, dressed as Elsa from Frozen.
“Stay where you are!” Bobby’s mom commanded after the first flash had gone off. “I set it to take five pictures in all…”
As soon as the fifth flash had gone off, the family scattered, gathering into small groups and clusters. The older family members had planned out days ago who was walking around the neighborhood with which of the younger kids. Dad was taking Lucas and Myla; Mom was chaperoning Shona, Skylar, and one of their friends; Oscar and Matthew were teaming up to take the four little ones, and Bobby and Karalyn were staying home to work on homework while giving out candy.
“I’m cool with this arrangement,” Karalyn commented once everyone else was out the door, and she and Bobby were situated in the foyer with their laptops. Karalyn had taken a Milky Way out of the candy bar and had bitten into it. “Sit here, get stuff done, answer the door, and eat as much candy as we want? Oh yeah, this is the life.”
“As long as we don’t eat all the candy,” said Bobby, helping himself to an Almond Joy.
“Just most of it,” teased Karalyn.
“Exactly.”
The first half hour passed quickly, with the doorbell ringing every few seconds, and Bobby and Karalyn taking turns jumping up to greet the various superheroes, villains, monsters, characters, animals, and objects who came to their door. The costumes were entertaining, and even though Bobby wasn’t getting a whole lot of work done, he was having fun.
The trick-or-treaters slowed down after a bit, once all the kids from their street had moved on to the surrounding roads, and kids who lived on the surrounding roads hadn’t arrived yet. “All right,” said Bobby, checking his watch. “I’m thinking we have about… maybe fifteen or twenty minutes before it starts getting busy again, what do you say?”
“Sounds about right,” Karalyn agreed. “All right, time to focus. In all that time, I only wrote two sentences of my paper!”
“You’re doing better than I am,” Bobby chuckled. “I barely have one sentence.”
They both managed to be somewhat productive during the slow part of the night, and then the traffic picked up again and they were back to answering the door. Bobby liked living in a neighborhood like this, in which there were a lot of kids. He’d rather have a busy Halloween night than a dead one any day.
The influx of kids from surrounding towns eventually died down, and Bobby and Karalyn had a chance to get more work done. “How many sentences are you at now?” Karalyn asked, right as the doorbell rang.
It was Bobby’s turn to answer it, so he got up, giving his typed essay a quick once-over. “I’ve actually got a couple paragraphs,” he told her.
“Lucky. I keep getting stuck on this intro.”
Bobby didn’t remember what Karalyn’s paper was supposed to be about, but as he reached for the door handle he shared a trick that worked well for him. “Skip the intro for now and then come back to it. Get the real meat of your paper done first. That’s what I do.” He opened the door to see a tiny elephant and an even tinier zebra staring up at him.
“Twick or tweat!” they chorused, each holding out a small bag.
“What cute costumes,” Bobby gushed, placing two pieces of candy in each bag. When older kids came to the door, he let them choose what pieces they wanted, but with kids this little, it usually worked best if he just handed candy out.
“I’m a lelephant and she’s a zebra,” the boy spoke up. His fleecy gray elephant suit covered his whole body, complete with a hood that came halfway down his face. The hood had eye holes, with a long trunk protruding from between them.
“I zebra!” the little girl echoed. She was smaller than the boy, and the hood of her zebra costume didn’t cover her face. Bobby could see with perfect clarity her big brown eyes, her short bangs, her chubby cheeks, and her smile. Her familiar smile.
It took Bobby a moment to remember where he’d seen these kids before. The realization of who was standing on his doorstep hit him like a truck. He looked up and there, standing behind them, was Aleah.
Thirty-Six
Aleah couldn’t breathe. How was this possible? There, standing right in front of her, dressed up like a football player, was Bobby.
Aleah had known Bobby lived in Brucksdale. She’d had no idea that he lived just two streets over from her.
“Bob-Bobby,” she stammered. “Hi… I didn’t know this was your house.” She felt her cheeks flush. I sound like an idiot.
Bobby looked just as dumbstruck. “I… didn’t know you lived in this neighborhood.”
“Yeah… we talked about living in Brucksdale, but we never told each other exactly where.”
“There were a lot of things we never told each other.” Bobby seemed to regret his words as soon as they escaped his mouth. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean it that way.”
Aleah knew exactly what he’d meant. It was too late to apologize for waiting so long to tell him about her kids. He probably wouldn’t accept her apology anyway. “Austin, Anna, come on. Time to go get candy at the next house!” She kept her voice upbeat for their sake.
Austin and Anna barely seemed to hear her. They were busy petting the dog who’d come to the door—a friendly yellow guy, probably some sort of Lab mix. One of Bobby’s sisters—Katelyn? Katherine? Something like that—was sitting next to the dog, stroking his side and smiling at the kids.
Bobby stepped outside of the house, so that he was standing on the front step next to Aleah. She didn’t dare look up through his helmet at his face. She didn’t want to see the anger and disappointment there.
Dear God, please let this moment be over quickly. Please help me to stop feeling so nervous. Help me through this moment, God, please.
“Why haven’t you answered any of my texts?” Bobby asked.
Aleah shrugged.
“Are you coming to the peer mentor meeting next week? Everyone else is. If you come, it’ll be the first time all five of us have been together.”
Aleah didn’t answer. This was the first time she’d been near Bobby in over three weeks, and she didn’t like the way standing so close to him was making her feel. She’d forgotten how tall he was. How kind his voice was. His football uniform was accentuating the muscles on his arms. She’d never noticed how strong he looked. Strong but gentle.
Her heart was pounding a million miles a minute. She couldn’t read exactly how Bobby felt about her—he didn’t seem angry or disappointed, but he didn’t seem like the same friend she’d eaten lunch with all those times either. He was uncomfortable around her, the same way she was uncomfortable around him.
A thought wormed its way into her brain. What if we got past the discomfort? Could we find our way back to friendship again?
The rapid pounding of her heart was the answer to that question. Aleah knew that it wasn’t just discomfort that was making her feel this way. She’d always been attracted to Bobby, even when she hadn’t wanted to admit it. And however little sense it made, those feelings of attraction had only grown stronger in their time apart.
Aleah didn’t think she could just be friends with Bobby, not if she felt this way about him. But becoming more than friends with Bobby was a hundred percent out of the question.
“Austin. Anna. Let’s go.” Her voice came out sounding sharp, and both of her children looked up, concern in their eyes. “It’s okay,” Aleah softened her tone. “But we need to keep going. It’s going to be bedtime soon.”
“Aleah…” Bobby sounded like he didn’t know what he wanted to say.
Aleah kept her focus on her children, taking each of them by the hand and carefully helping them down Bobby’s front steps. Anna started whining, and Aleah was glad for an excuse not to engage Bobby. “What’s wrong, little princess?”
“Tired,” Anna moaned. It was no wonder. They’d been out for at least an hour, and Aleah had already started wondering whether two was a little too young for trick-or-treating.
“Well, I think it’s time to head home now. What do you think?”
“Yes!” Austin ran for the stroller Aleah had parked on the side of the road in front of Bobby’s house. It was a double stroller, and even though Austin and Anna were both getting a little too big for it, it was perfect for times like this. Austin and Anna never would have made it past their next-door neighbors’ house if they’d had to walk the whole way.
Aleah hurriedly strapped both of her children in, talking to them the entire time in an effort to discourage Bobby from talking to her. She spun the stroller around and proceeded briskly back toward her own street.
***
“You knew her?” Karalyn asked as Aleah and her kids disappeared down the street.
“Yeah,” said Bobby, with a dull ache in his chest. “I knew her.” He kept the past tense because it was clear that Aleah didn’t want to know him anymore.
“From school?”
Bobby nodded.
“She looked young. Were those her kids or is she babysitting?”
Bobby collapsed in his chair. “Her kids.”
“Are you okay?” Karalyn was giving him a concerned look. “You seem… a little off.”
“I’m just tired.” It was a lie, and Bobby felt bad about it. He was also pretty sure Karalyn could see through it. But he didn’t want to explain about Aleah at the moment. He just wanted some time alone.
He checked the time on his computer screen. “Everyone should be getting back in about fifteen minutes,” he told his sister. “Do you think you can handle the rest of the trick-or-treaters? I’m gonna go lie down.”
Karalyn eyed him skeptically. “You can just tell me what the deal is between you and that girl, you know. There’s obviously something going on.”
“Maybe sometime. I don’t want to talk about it right now.” Bobby picked up his laptop and dragged the chair back into the kitchen, where it had come from. “I’m going to my room.”
Bobby moseyed downstairs and flopped on his bed, emotionally spent. He knew he’d have to fake energy and excitement as soon as the younger kids got home and ran down to show him their loot. He might even be recruited to help with Nicholas or Bridget’s makeup removal, or to give Olivia a bath. But for right now, he didn’t feel like doing a thing. He just needed to be alone with his thoughts.
Thoughts about Aleah.
|
|
